As Father’s Day nears in just a few weeks, that inevitable panic sets in. Shopping for your mom may be a breeze. Buy her a new bag, a bath soak, or something heartfelt and sweet. But what the heck do you buy your dad? What about the man who fathered your child? Why are men so hard to shop for?
Every time we have to buy a gift for a man, we sit racking our brains for hours. What could he possibly want — tools? How can you truly show your love for the man who not only raised you but also raised your standards for the people you date? We’ve been there before.
If you’re stressing over what to buy your dad or another father-figure in your life for Father’s Day, fear not. We’ve got just the gifts for you to snag — and they’re sure to make him laugh.
1. A humor-filled card to show your love
If you and your dad share a sense of humor, a card is the perfect way to show your appreciation for him — and give him a laugh.
Get a Father’s Day that states the obvious: “I used to live in your balls.” Or tell him his pullout game is lame. Remind him what a great child you are and that you’re his favorite — which is a gift in and of itself.
Thank him for everything he’s done — like funding your lifestyle and paying rent while you went through college (and maybe a little after).
If you’re celebrating the father of your kids, tell him that you make cute babies together. Or thank him for knocking you up.
If you prefer a simpler message, tell him he’s the father of the fucking year. No matter your relationship or the message you want to send, there’s a perfect card to show your love and appreciation for the dad in your life.
2. A candle to make him laugh
Get your dad a candle with a message to make him chuckle every time he sees it above the fireplace in your childhood home.
Consider one with an apology for your teenage years. He probably got most of his grey hair while you were between the ages of 14 and 18.
If your relationship with your dad involves gossiping about — and trying to avoid conversations with — your QAnon conspiracy aunt, get him one to remind him of the ever-so-fun experience of trying to hide from the family. It’ll make him reminisce how you spent your teen years avoiding the rest of your family because you thought you were too cool for them.
Opt for a classic daddy-themed candle. Leather Daddy smells like meat, peony, and leather. It’s the perfect subtle Father’s Day gift.
3. A mug for his morning coffee — or whisky
If your dad can’t talk to anyone in the morning without his morning coffee, get him a mug that will remind him of you every day.
Remind him sarcastically that he’s a ray of fucking sunshine before that second cup.
Give him a laugh and remind him that fatherhood is serious business — it can’t all be coke and threesomes.
Or get one that sends the message that fatherhood is in fact, a wonderful journey. And you love that for him.
It may have been stressful as a child when your dad told you to hold the flashlight higher as he fixed the pipes under the sink. But least those household projects taught you the difference between a Phillips and flathead screwdriver. Or maybe not. Either way, those are the memories that last forever.
We hope you’re able to find a little something to celebrate your dad — or the dad figure in your life.