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Funny Candle Eat a Bag of D*cks Banana Soy Candle 9 oz

  • $24.95
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Please read description and look at photos prior to ordering. Fonts are distressed and purposely printed this way.

Wait… this candle really smells like a bag of d*cks!? Why yes! Yes, it does!  This funny candle is a perfect statement piece for the guest room when your guests are of questionable quality.

Smells like STFU and bananas.⁠


Product Details

PLEASE NOTE ALL CANDLES HAVE DISTRESSED FONTS. THEY ARE PURPOSELY DESIGNED TO LOOK "MESSY."

9 oz
Soy wax
Clear gloss glass jar
Gold brushed metal lid
3.5 inches tall by 2.75 inches wide
Burns for 50 hours
Comes in a box

Candle Care + Safety

  1. Melt It Right: Let that baby burn for a solid two hours on the first go. It's like giving your candle a warm-up exercise. The whole surface needs to turn into liquid wax for a level burn throughout its luxurious life.

  2. Wick Wisdom: Trim the wick to ¼ inch before lighting, and clear out any debris hanging out in the wax pool. It's like giving your candle a spa day before the big performance.

  3. Don't Overcommit: Just like a Tinder date, don't burn your candle for more than 3-4 hours at a stretch. Too much of a good thing can turn your wick into a rebellious teenager, "mushrooming" all over the place. Plus, nobody likes a smoky room – it's not a barbecue, after all.

  4. Airhead-Free Zone: Keep that flame away from breezy situations. Moving air is like your candle's annoying friend who can't stop interrupting. Say no to pesky black marks and keep the air calm.

  5. Hot Spots and Safety First: Set the stage for your candle's grand performance on a stable, heat-resistant surface. It's the red carpet for your wax superstar, preventing heat damage and glass container drama. And, of course, keep it away from tiny humans and furry friends – safety first, candle magic second!

  6. Guard Your Flame: Like a VIP, your candle deserves constant attention. Don't leave it unattended, because even wax royalty needs a watchful eye.

Shipping and Processing

*Items that ship separately take 2-7 business days to ship.

SHIPPING

Items ship within 1-3 business days except for between November - February when shipping time is 1-5 business days.

If you choose expedited shipping, your package will ship by the following business day.

Items that ship separately ship are not eligible for expedited shipping.

Packages generally take 2-7 business days to arrive after shipping unless expedited shipping is chosen. For more info please refer to USPS or UPS's websites for transit times.

USPS/UPS do NOT guarantee delivery times. Therefore Crimson and Clover CANNOT guarantee delivery times. 

TRACKING

You will receive tracking info once your item is shipped.

NON US CUSTOMERS

Please note the buyer is responsible for paying any taxes upon arrival in their home country. Any packages that are sent back because the buyer refused to pay taxes will not be refunded. 

More questions? Check our our FAQ.

Customer Reviews

Based on 38 reviews
82%
(31)
13%
(5)
0%
(0)
5%
(2)
0%
(0)
M
Michelle Barnes
Eat A Bag Of Dicks :)

Amazing candle, actually does smell like bananas lol. Took a picture of it and posted it on my social media page. It immediately got 20 likes. Great work!

M
Michelle Barnes
Eat A Bag Of Dicks :)

Amazing candle, actually does smell like bananas lol. Took a picture of it and posted it on my social media page. It immediately got 20 likes. Great work!

C
Cheri Hane
5 Stars

Ahhh! lol This is going to be THE best House warming gift for a friend. So happy I found your shop!

C
Cheri Hane
Ahhh! lol This is going to be THE best H...

Ahhh! lol This is going to be THE best House warming gift for a friend. So happy I found your shop!

C
Cheri Hane
Ahhh! lol This is going to be THE best H...

Ahhh! lol This is going to be THE best House warming gift for a friend. So happy I found your shop!

123
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Please read description and look at photos prior to ordering. Fonts are distressed and purposely printed this way.

Wait… this candle really smells like a bag of d*cks!? Why yes! Yes, it does!  This funny candle is a perfect statement piece for the guest room when your guests are of questionable quality.

Smells like STFU and bananas.⁠


Product Details

PLEASE NOTE ALL CANDLES HAVE DISTRESSED FONTS. THEY ARE PURPOSELY DESIGNED TO LOOK "MESSY."

9 oz
Soy wax
Clear gloss glass jar
Gold brushed metal lid
3.5 inches tall by 2.75 inches wide
Burns for 50 hours
Comes in a box

Candle Care + Safety

  1. Melt It Right: Let that baby burn for a solid two hours on the first go. It's like giving your candle a warm-up exercise. The whole surface needs to turn into liquid wax for a level burn throughout its luxurious life.

  2. Wick Wisdom: Trim the wick to ¼ inch before lighting, and clear out any debris hanging out in the wax pool. It's like giving your candle a spa day before the big performance.

  3. Don't Overcommit: Just like a Tinder date, don't burn your candle for more than 3-4 hours at a stretch. Too much of a good thing can turn your wick into a rebellious teenager, "mushrooming" all over the place. Plus, nobody likes a smoky room – it's not a barbecue, after all.

  4. Airhead-Free Zone: Keep that flame away from breezy situations. Moving air is like your candle's annoying friend who can't stop interrupting. Say no to pesky black marks and keep the air calm.

  5. Hot Spots and Safety First: Set the stage for your candle's grand performance on a stable, heat-resistant surface. It's the red carpet for your wax superstar, preventing heat damage and glass container drama. And, of course, keep it away from tiny humans and furry friends – safety first, candle magic second!

  6. Guard Your Flame: Like a VIP, your candle deserves constant attention. Don't leave it unattended, because even wax royalty needs a watchful eye.

Shipping and Processing

*Items that ship separately take 2-7 business days to ship.

SHIPPING

Items ship within 1-3 business days except for between November - February when shipping time is 1-5 business days.

If you choose expedited shipping, your package will ship by the following business day.

Items that ship separately ship are not eligible for expedited shipping.

Packages generally take 2-7 business days to arrive after shipping unless expedited shipping is chosen. For more info please refer to USPS or UPS's websites for transit times.

USPS/UPS do NOT guarantee delivery times. Therefore Crimson and Clover CANNOT guarantee delivery times. 

TRACKING

You will receive tracking info once your item is shipped.

NON US CUSTOMERS

Please note the buyer is responsible for paying any taxes upon arrival in their home country. Any packages that are sent back because the buyer refused to pay taxes will not be refunded. 

More questions? Check our our FAQ.