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FLAT $5 SHIPPING. FREE SHIPPING ON ALL US ORDERS OVER $35
Sale
Sale

Funny Birthday Card No Gonorrhea

  • $6.00
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Some people wish for health, wealth, and happiness. You? You keep it real with this funny birthday card for adults that hopes they make it another year without contracting gonorrhea. Thoughtful, right?

This hilarious card is perfect for a friend birthday card, a husband birthday card, or really anyone who can appreciate dark humor (and maybe needs a subtle reminder to make better choices). If you’re tired of the same old boring birthday cards for him or her, this one delivers a unique and unexpected message—one they won’t soon forget.

Ideal for lovers of funny, unique greeting cards with a snarky edge, this card is a great way to say “Happy Birthday” while keeping things interesting. Because nothing says "I care" quite like hoping they dodge an STD for another year.
Details
  • Premium 4.5" x 6.25" greeting card
  • Printed on luxurious 100% cotton textured cardstock
  • Includes kraft envelope in protective cellophane sleeve
  • Dampen with sponge to seal
  • Blank interior for your personal message
  • Gift notes from checkout print on packing slip, not inside card

Design Note: Some cards feature intentionally distressed typography for a deliberately "worn" aesthetic - this rustic style is purposeful, not a printing error. Please review product images carefully before ordering.

 

Shipping and Processing

*Items that ship separately take 2-7 business days to ship.

SHIPPING

Why does it cost $5 to ship a card? Cards must be shipped in a rigid flat mailer to prevent bending during transit. Cards cannot be shipped with a stamp, in an plain envelope or any other material. We do offer free shipping with no tracking which is much cheaper.

When will my order ship?

Items ship within 1-4 business days except for between November - February when shipping time is 1-6 business days.

What if I need it sooner?

If you choose expedited shipping, your package will ship by the following business day.  Items that ship separately ship are NOT eligible for expedited shipping.

Priority: 1-3 business days

Ground: 1-5 business days

2 Day - 2 days

3 Day - 3 days

Overnight - Overnight

Please note these are counted after the carrier picks up the item. Carrier can experience unforseen delays which is Crimson and Clover Studio is not responsible for. 

How long will it take to get to me?

Packages generally take 2-7 business days to arrive after shipping unless expedited shipping is chosen. For more info please refer to USPS or UPS's websites for transit times.

If you selected Free Shipping NO TRACKING please leave up to 7-10 business days.

USPS/UPS do NOT guarantee delivery times. Therefore Crimson and Clover CANNOT guarantee delivery times. 

TRACKING

You will receive tracking info once your item is shipped.

If you didn't receive tracking it is because you chose Free Shipping - NO TRACKING at checkout. These packages cannot be tracked. You would have received a shipping notification with no tracking.

NON US CUSTOMERS

Please note the buyer is responsible for paying any taxes upon arrival in their home country. Any packages that are sent back because the buyer refused to pay taxes will not be refunded. 

Customer Reviews

Based on 182 reviews
100%
(182)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
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S
Stacey

Great card.

N
N.S.

❤️

M
Maralyn

Great quality

A
Anonymous
Recipient lived the card

Good quality. Decent price. Very funny

A
Anonymous
Recipient lived the card

Good quality. Decent price. Very funny

123
Some people wish for health, wealth, and happiness. You? You keep it real with this funny birthday card for adults that hopes they make it another year without contracting gonorrhea. Thoughtful, right?

This hilarious card is perfect for a friend birthday card, a husband birthday card, or really anyone who can appreciate dark humor (and maybe needs a subtle reminder to make better choices). If you’re tired of the same old boring birthday cards for him or her, this one delivers a unique and unexpected message—one they won’t soon forget.

Ideal for lovers of funny, unique greeting cards with a snarky edge, this card is a great way to say “Happy Birthday” while keeping things interesting. Because nothing says "I care" quite like hoping they dodge an STD for another year.
Details
  • Premium 4.5" x 6.25" greeting card
  • Printed on luxurious 100% cotton textured cardstock
  • Includes kraft envelope in protective cellophane sleeve
  • Dampen with sponge to seal
  • Blank interior for your personal message
  • Gift notes from checkout print on packing slip, not inside card

Design Note: Some cards feature intentionally distressed typography for a deliberately "worn" aesthetic - this rustic style is purposeful, not a printing error. Please review product images carefully before ordering.

 

Shipping and Processing

*Items that ship separately take 2-7 business days to ship.

SHIPPING

Why does it cost $5 to ship a card? Cards must be shipped in a rigid flat mailer to prevent bending during transit. Cards cannot be shipped with a stamp, in an plain envelope or any other material. We do offer free shipping with no tracking which is much cheaper.

When will my order ship?

Items ship within 1-4 business days except for between November - February when shipping time is 1-6 business days.

What if I need it sooner?

If you choose expedited shipping, your package will ship by the following business day.  Items that ship separately ship are NOT eligible for expedited shipping.

Priority: 1-3 business days

Ground: 1-5 business days

2 Day - 2 days

3 Day - 3 days

Overnight - Overnight

Please note these are counted after the carrier picks up the item. Carrier can experience unforseen delays which is Crimson and Clover Studio is not responsible for. 

How long will it take to get to me?

Packages generally take 2-7 business days to arrive after shipping unless expedited shipping is chosen. For more info please refer to USPS or UPS's websites for transit times.

If you selected Free Shipping NO TRACKING please leave up to 7-10 business days.

USPS/UPS do NOT guarantee delivery times. Therefore Crimson and Clover CANNOT guarantee delivery times. 

TRACKING

You will receive tracking info once your item is shipped.

If you didn't receive tracking it is because you chose Free Shipping - NO TRACKING at checkout. These packages cannot be tracked. You would have received a shipping notification with no tracking.

NON US CUSTOMERS

Please note the buyer is responsible for paying any taxes upon arrival in their home country. Any packages that are sent back because the buyer refused to pay taxes will not be refunded.