Shopping for a Valentine’s Day card for him gets weird fast. Half the aisle assumes he wants a sports joke. The other half acts like you are about to renew your vows.
If your boyfriend or husband would rather laugh, start with our funny Valentine’s Day cards and choose something that sounds like your actual relationship.
Funny Valentine’s Day cards for a boyfriend
The Hunkasaurus Card works when subtlety is not the goal. If you met online, the So Glad You Swiped Right Card gives your origin story the amount of dignity it deserves.
Dirty Valentine’s Day cards for him
The Thanks for Having a Big D*ck Card is direct. The My What a Handsome 🐓 You Have Card is not exactly subtle either. And the I Was Going to Give You a BJ Card handles Valentine’s disappointment before it even happens.
Funny Valentine cards for a husband
Long-term relationships give you better material. The I’ll Love You When Your Balls Are Old and Wrinkly Card is technically a promise of lifelong devotion. It just has worse lighting.
The Panties Wet Card is a better fit when the message is that he still does it for you.
Want something even filthier? See our dirty Valentine’s Day card guide.